Funk

Lately I have felt in a funk... not fun. I haven't been able to seem to shake it. Emotional ups and downs and all arounds. I've been feeling a bit crazy and off my game for a little while. I wonder if it is my body settling back into place after having Peyton, or getting used to new hormones. It could be both. It could of course, also be stress. Either way I hate it.

Today it was like the clouds broke and the sun sparkled through bringing those wonderful rays of light shining down on me... though yes it has been rainy... haha.

I don't know what helped. The fact that I prayed could be one. The fact that I realized not much is in my control. The fact that I woke up this morning determined not to be snappy or crabby. Any of those, all of those. I woke up, went on with my normal morning routine. Once downstairs I put Peyton down to play in her saucer and checked my various websites I go to. Upon reaching my baby group on CafeMom I noticed 5 members in chat... FIVE!!! This has been a rare occurance lately!

So of course I join right in. All the sudden, I wasn't dragged down by everything that has been bothering me... I was able to be the goofy, dorky, silly old Janae I was before! It felt amazing. I was free of the funk. I chatted, drank my morning coffee and had a blast.

Since then I unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher, played and danced silly with Baylee and Wyatt, fed Peyton and put her down for a nap, fed Baylee and Wyatt and let them go play in the toy area. While of course more cleaning can be done... I feel productive. I feel happy! I feel like I am accomplishing things that I have been putting off.

While I may not get to have daily conversations with friends, it was great this morning to just be out there and talking freely about anything and everything. Gotta say I love my JuneBug Mommies!!!!! Of course I love all my other friends as well... dont hear me saying that I dont!

Well it seems I am on a good path... a path to finding the old Janae once again. You know another thing that helped... reading Mike's blog... I found a quote that seemed was perfect. I NEEDED to see that quote... I NEEDED someone to say that to me... and it was right there staring me in the face.

"Wanting to be someone you're not is a waste of the person you are." - Kurt Cobain

Think about it... I will leave you with that!!!